CASCAID’s new festive job role

CASCAID’s new festive job role

With the holiday season closing in on us and demand being high at the North Pole, Santa Claus has asked the team at CASCAID to add in a new career choice to help him gather recruits.

 

cascaid-characters-santa-04Christmas Operations Manager – Santa Claus

Are you a responsible person, who enjoys giving presents and gifts to people (only if they have been nice over the previous 12 months)? Well, as the Christmas Operations Manager, or Santa Claus, you will oversee the operation of a highly advanced toy manufacturing process and also maintain and consult a detailed annual behaviour rating database (ABeRD).

You will need a be a strong leader, with responsibility for a team of Elves and reindeer – so an ability to get on with people, magical beings and animals is a must!

 

As Santa Claus you will need to;

  • Be capable of growing a substantial white beard, or happy to wear a false one at all times if growing one is an issue (i.e. you’re female)
  • Have comfortable knees – thousands of children will need to perch on your knees and tell you want they want for Christmas, and so knobbly knees could be an issue.
  • Be capable of eating thousands of mince pies in one night and still smile and fit down standard sized chimneys.
  • Be capable of creating and working with huge lists – you will use the ABeRD in order to judge who has been naughty or nice.
  • Qualifications aren’t really important for this career – life experience is valued more highly by your potential employers (The Elves).

However, a Master’s Degree in ‘Christmas Manufacturing Processes’, or ‘Elven Language Skills’ would help you to stand out from the crowd.

You may be able to get onto an Intermediate Apprenticeship in ‘Toy Manufacture’, and work your way up. However, vacancies are rare.

What are the Job Prospects?

 You will not be paid a salary as Santa Claus. Instead, you will gain all your wealth from the happiness you get from knowing what a wonderful Christmas nice girls and boys all over the world are having, thanks to your hard work.

The Elves will provide you with an excellent standard of five star accommodation and meals during the year.

You will also be provided with a sleigh, which will be powered by magical reindeer. It will be up to you, however, to ensure that the reindeer are properly fed and looked after. Grumpy reindeer, even magical ones, will not perform their duties to the expected standard.

What Skills are needed?

  • In order to become Santa Claus you will need to be:
  • Chubby
  • Jolly
  • Ruddy in complexion (red faced)
  • Capable of motivating a team of mischievous, easily distracted Elves
  • Capable of eating large amounts of mince pies in one night
  • A person who enjoys the taste of port
  • A lover of magical animals
  • A team player – but also capable of working alone, as no one outside of your wonderland is allowed to see you (except for special public grotto appearances)
  • Be capable of growing a substantial white beard, or happy to wear a false one at all times if growing one is an issue (i.e. you’re female)
  • Loud, but not scary (a bit like Brian Blessed, but maybe not quite as loud)
  • Someone who can carry off wearing a lot of red.

 Entry Routes

 Previous work/life experience is essential for this role. Maybe you could think about working in a toy shop, or volunteering to be a pretend Santa at your school fete? Write to the North Pole and ask if you could get some work experience alongside the Elves – see exactly how it all works.

 Qualifications

 Qualifications aren’t really important for this career – life experience is valued more highly by your potential employers.

However, a Master’s Degree in ‘Christmas Manufacturing Processes’, or ‘Elven Language Skills’ would help you to stand out from the crowd.

You may be able to get onto an Intermediate Apprenticeship in ‘Toy Manufacture’, and work your way up. However, vacancies are rare.

Work Activities

 The Christmas Operations Manager (Santa Claus) is a highly responsible position required to ensure the effective and efficient world-wide delivery of toys and presents to children on Christmas Eve.

In this role you will oversee the operations of an advanced manufacturing, assembly and distribution plant located at the North Pole. You will lead a team of Elves – who sometimes can be awkward and temperamental. You must inspire and motivate them towork hard during the year, otherwise Christmas will be ruined for millions of children, all over the world – and that would be BAD.

Santa Claus is a full-time role, and requires lots of preparation over the year before Christmas Eve arrives. You will need to receive orders from the children, decide if they have been naughty or nice, load the sleigh, feed your reindeer, all before you can head out on your delivery run.

You must enjoy living in tough, cold conditions as you will be based at the North Pole. You will also be responsible for taking care of a team of magical reindeer called:

  • Dasher
  • Dancer
  • Prancer
  • Vixen
  • Comet
  • Cupid
  • Donner
  • Blitzen

There is one further reindeer, called Rudolph. He has a very shiny red nose. It will be your decision whether you wish to include him in your team or not. However, he will expect you to sing his special song.

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